Hayt'en

I'm scrapping the boxer - basketball team comparison idea because I think the whole thing is too superficial to give any real new insights into the sport we all (excluding Steve) love.

My ideas up to this point were that 1) the Celtics = Floyd Mayweather Jr. (Because they both talk a lot of smack but have the defensive chops to back it up) and 2) that the Golden State Warriors = Manny Pacquiao (because they are both ridiculously undersized and fast). Truehoop has recently done the whole "Garnett/Celtics acting like the O'Doyle family" issue to death here and here so fuck that. And the Warriors blow, whereas Manny is a pint-sized killing machine.

Instead, in the spirit of Steve's post re: what sucks about basketball, I wanted to introduce everything that is wrong with professional basketball, and perhaps America as a whole, by name... and that name is Kevin Pittsnogle. 

I want to like the guy, I honestly do. He seems like a sweet guy on his myspace page and Deadspin even did a little piece on how much they love him.

But he named his kid "Kwynsie", which is paramount to child abuse. A human life is on the line here folks. Starting your life with a name like Kwynsie Pittsnogle may be too great of a handicap for any child to overcome. Please, anybody in the Albuquerque region who comes into contact with Kevin, talk to him, explain the shame and horror he is inflicting on an innocent young life and maybe we can put a halt to this travesty before it's too late.

On to brighter things, here's a tight mixtape via gowhere hip hop: iLL Vibes presents: 'Music I Wish Was On The Radio: Vol. 1'

Wale has a couple of great ones on there and Joe Budden and LA's tracks are unbelievable (not in the same way that naming your child Kwynsie is unbelievable).

Steve's Passion: A Brief History

Let me begin by saying: I hate basketball.

No, wait. Let me start at the beginning.

I didn't used to hate basketball. Back when I still thought this small white frame could ball amongst these 7'0 giants in the big leagues, I bled light teal and brown for my Grizzlies. And not the laughingstock, 4,000 people attending a game excuse for a franchise from Memphis. I'm talking about the Vancouver team, the one from the place that, you know, actually inhabits grizzly bears. Until Michael "Dream-Crusher" Heisley came through (nickname origin unknown), I actually attended basketball games, watching Bryant Reeves slowly turn from this into this. As the Grizzlies left, so too did my interest for a sport where music plays during gameplay, the first forty-five minutes are useless, and douches who bring giant cardboard Ds and fences are encouraged. But I digress..

Being a Canadian naturally comes with a little inferiority complex, but having a team ripped away to play in a place I had not yet heard of broke my tiny tiny heart. Since then I have made it my mission to avoid basketball at all costs, and focus on a sport that has carelessly spread joy and love to uninterested markets everywhere: the NHL. Every week or so, I'm happy to bring you my reasons why the NHL is totally more awesome than the NBA. First up: fighting fans.

NBA:



Fair. Sure, whoopass was applied, but certainly not in can form. For that we'll have to turn to:



Lesson: don't mess with Rob Ray. Ever. And for the ultimate smackdown, we turn to Mike Milbury, who somehow manages, in full hockey gear, to climb into the stands, confront a fan and pummel him with his own shoe. Game, set, match.

Clips vs T Wolves

Watching these two teams is like watching grade 9 girl's basketball. Six consecutive possessions just ended in turnovers. Shoot me now.

Can't Be Touched

All the hype about the Pacquiao - De La Hoya fight has got me thinking boxing. Specifically its got me wondering, which boxers are the most akin to my favourite NBA teams?

My first instinct was to write a post comparing the Suns to Oscar - both are considered Golden Boys, are immensely popular and, recently, have been living off of past reputation rather than current success. However, aesthetically the two don't match up, Oscar's pretty boy features don't really induce comparisons to Steve Nash's (ex) greasy mop of hair, Shawn Marion's funky-looking jumpshot (yes, I know he's gone but I really wanted to bring up just how ugly those shooting mechanics are) or Shaq's 350 pounds of solid fat. After thinking a bit more I realized that the Suns might be more accurately likened to Roy Jones Jr.

Like the 7 seconds or less Suns, or the Showtime Lakers, Roy has always been valued for his showmanship and Flashlike speed. Now that he has slowed down, his deficiencies as a fighter are laid bare - likewise, now that the Suns have brought in Shaq and curbed their running game, their inability to execute in the halfcourt is becoming more and more obvious.

I'm going to do a little series covering the boxer/NBA team parallels. Up next, the world champion Boston Celtics!

Until then - Can't Be Touched - Roy Jones Jr.

A is for Apple...

... and B is for (Kobe) Bean (Bryant).

This is going to be my first shot at a blog so I thought I'd start at the beginning.

Who am I?

Name: Sam

Age: 20

Gender: Male

Location: Montreal, Canada

What do I like?

Sports: Balling, fencing, frisbee

Academics: Politics, economics, cultural studies (minus the hipsters)

Music: Ska, hip hop

What am I doing here?

In this blog I want to take a look at professional basketball from an outsider perspective. I am NOT a basketball player - I love the sport but have never played in any kind of organized fashion. The first time I made any effort to learn the game was in grade 11 because my buddies had started the MBL (Mini Basketball League) and I didn't want to get laughed at. My years (2) on the Birdcity Birdmen were the formative experience that I needed to appreciate just how good the players are in the big league.

I prefer fadeaway jumpers to dunks and I hope that this blog can be a forum for like-minded individuals.

suck it Bruce

Until next time here's a sweet track that I lifted from gowherehiphop.blogspot.com: Cam'ron - Owe Me (Oh No You Didn't!)